You're Not Alone: Confidence

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You're Not Alone: Confidence

You're Not Alone

Written by Ross Tayler

Wednesday, 19 November 2008 12:22

Submitted Question: What are your thoughts on confidence?

Confidence is defined as; belief in oneself and one's powers or abilities; self-confidence; self-reliance; assurance: His lack of confidence defeated him.

This really ties into the column I wrote in October. In that column I talked about how beliefs and experiences influence what we believe we are capable of. By allowing ourselves to have experiences that challenge us we begin to grow and our confidence and belief in ourselves grows.

A lack of confidence can often be linked to a lack of experience or rather an opportunity to experience growth. As you learn a new task or skill you are building your confidence which takes time. The first step is to challenge yourself to move towards the new skill or opportunity which can also be situational. Take public speaking for example. This is a very scary experience for many people. The first step may be to join a group like Toastmasters so that you can challenge yourself and build skills. Another example could be starting a conversation with a stranger. No matter what the situation you are learning and building confidence through experience.

There are four stages you go through when learning a new skill or task.

Unconscious Incompetence - You don't know what you don't know, you are unaware. In essence you have tunnel vision because you are learning this new task. Ex. Learning to drive.

Conscious Incompetence - You are beginning to become aware of what you don't know. You start to realize mistakes you are making.

Conscious Competence - You are becoming confident of your skills yet still unaware. You are starting to feel comfortable anxiety and fear are not present.

Unconscious Competence - You are able to perform the task confidently without really thinking about it. Ex. You are able to talk on your cellphone and put your make-up on while driving. Note: This is not a good idea, but it is a good illustration of this step.....

So whatever the opportunity you would like to experience, ask yourself what can I do to build skills in this area? The result will be a stronger belief in yourself and your abilities.

Video: The Lion King

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